Ministry Lessons: Can Others Say It Better?

We all know ministry can be a humbling experience. We say the wrong thing or let a student get us riled up. Maybe our lesson sounded better in our head as we prepared to teach than it did when we actually taught it. If you keep volunteering long enough, you’ll have plenty of humbling experiences.

One of the ways I’ve chosen to humble myself is by opening my mind to others who can teach with more authority on a subject than I can. When I wanted to teach a lesson on the differences between Mormonism and Christianity, I brought in a couple of ex-Mormons who teach a class on the subject. That was a few years ago, but students still refer back to it whenever Mormonism comes up in conversation.

There is a ministry called Nooma that has excellent videos on a wide variety of topics. When I’ve used them, students are challenged toward life-change because the teacher, Rob Bell, is so much more gifted at teaching than I am. Sometimes it’s better to let Rob teach then I lead a discussion afterward about what he taught.

Some of our best, most memorable nights of Bible study have been when I’ve humbled myself willingly to allow somebody more qualified or gifted to speak on a subject to take my place. If I don’t humble myself, I have a way of getting humbled by trying to be more than I am. As my pastor, Rick Warren, teaches, “Learn the lesson of the whale. When you get to the top, and you’re ready to blow, that’s when you get harpooned.” I hate being harpooned… especially when it’s a self-inflicted wound.

This is a lesson that requires a major caveat: If you are the teacher, be the teacher. A video is a teaching aid. It may convey a message, but it probably won’t be a lasting message in the hearts and minds of the students without some discussion. Also, my hope is that you will rely on outside sources sparingly. They can be misused if you are relying on them solely to teach. My goal is to teach 90% or more of the time. This requires preparation on my part. Some may use videos and outside teachers as a way to avoid doing their homework. Students look to you for teaching. Do your best to not disappoint.

How To Last In Youth Ministry: Working With Out-Of-Control Students

Many of us became youth ministry volunteers either because somebody helped us get through our teenage years or because we want to help others avoid the same mistakes we made during our adolescent years. However, many times leaders get overwhelmed by students once they start volunteering.

Last year I spent a few days substitute teaching at the local high school so that I could have another way to reach students. After the third day, I realized it wasn’t going to work out. They were rude, manipulative, cheating heathens. And those were just the freshman girls. Even though I’ve been working with students for 15 years, I was completely caught off guard. Instead of molding young minds, I was fighting a losing battle for my life. I was done after 3 days.

Many of us feel that way when we walk into the youth ministries of our church. I can understand the feeling of being overwhelmed and wanting to give up. Fortunately, I feel a little more equipped to handle issues at church than in our public school system. I’m not so naive to think I can blindly solve the problems specific to your ministry through an article on my blog. However, I do have some lifelines I can toss your direction with hopes of helping you last:

1. Add reinforcements – If students are taking over, that can be a sign that there isn’t enough adult presence. An ideal ratio is 7-10 students to every adult in a large group program. In a small group program, the ratio works better with 3-5 students to every leader. Adding leaders can be one of the toughest tasks in ministry. However, until you do, count on being over run. To bring in more leaders, you need to sell the potential of the ministry to other godly adults who can share the vision for what your ministry can accomplish.

2. Be ready before they arrive – Idle hands are the Devil’s playground. If students are arriving and they’re not getting your attention because your team is still getting the program setup, they will find something else to do… which could involve mischief. If they’re out of control before your program begins, the event loses a lot of it’s ministry potential.

3. Give them responsibility – A great way to turn this around is to put them in charge of what you’re usually doing when they arrive. If you’re putting out chairs as they walk in, invite them to help and then anoint them as leaders of the chair ministry each week. If you’re setting up the stage, begin a stage crew.

4. Introduce structure – Many times students are out of control because of a lack of structure. Adding structural elements to your program, no matter how big or small, will give students something to adhere to. If your program is different every week and is out of control, that could make it difficult for your students to stay focused. An extreme example of structure is a private school with strict rules and uniforms. Although they still have behavioral issues, they will be less in frequency and severity as an underfunded inner-city school with gang problems. When structure and authority (see point number 5 below) are added, the ministry becomes manageable and your efforts can be directed more toward building them into fully devoted followers of Christ instead of hellions that make you want to scream and give up.

5. Assert authority – I don’t think I should write any specific action step here because it requires such a variety of responses based on each specific situation. The bottom line is that allowing unruly students to overshadow ministry efforts prohibits others from being ministered to. When I first started volunteering at Saddleback Church, I had two students who destroyed the community our small group Bible study time. In hind sight, I should have invited them not to return until they could participate in the Bible study without being so disruptive. Because of two students, visitors would not return and regular students stopped attending. I learned my lesson from that situation over the course of a year. Several years of experience later, I would never let that happen today.

If you’re going to last in ministry, you need to have a plan in place to deal with what would try to destroy what God wants to do through you.

Staying Up-To-Date with Youth Culture

Fortunately, we don’t have to spend hours listening to mind-numbing music, read every youth-related website or subscribe to dozens of magazines to get a handle on today’s youth culture. The Center For Youth/Parent Understanding has everything you could want to know about today’s youth culture. They track youth trends and have information about all of the latest movies, TV shows, bands and beliefs bombarding our students.

I recommend bookmarking CPYU’s web page and skimming through it at least once a month and whenever big news happens in relation to students. They not only have information, they also offer direction and free resources for how to interact with students in relation to their culture.

Click here to visit their website

Life Lessons: What I learned About Ministry at the Gas Station

Tonight after church I stopped to get gas. The pump shut off about 5 times before I got 12 cent’s worth of gas in my tank. A little frustrated, I moved to a different pump. That pump would not accept my ATM card. That was it. Time to go across the street to another gas station.

At the other gas station, it was a complete opposite experience. I am not making this up to make a point. There was seriously soothing classical music playing. The pump accepted my ATM card and worked perfectly on the first try without stopping. There was a squeegee soaking in water with windshield cleaner waiting for me. I was in gas station heaven.

It may be a slight jump to make this connection, but it was a great reminder about ministry. Students visit our youth ministries with needs. If our ministry is as useless to them as that first gas station was to me, we’ve missed an opportunity. That missed opportunity could have eternal consequences.

As volunteers, here are 3 simple ways we can make sure students have a good experience when they visit our ministries:

1. Look for visitors. It’s so easy to focus on students we always connect with. I like to connect up with a regular student and greet visitors together. It takes the pressure off the regular student, teaches him how to connect with newbies and helps the visitor feel more connected by meeting two people at one time.

2. Know your ministry. Many times when I meet a new student, I’ll find out they’re looking for information about what our ministry has to offer. Knowing ahead of time details of events and where to get resources (calendars, sign up forms, etc) helps the student have a better experience.

3. Remember the student’s name and a detail about them. I am horrible at doing this. I’m so bad, in fact, I make a point to tell the student I want him to forget my name so I don’t feel bad about forgetting his name. I tell him it will take about 20 times for me to remember it. I am genuinely working on getting better at this. I’m getting better. Maybe you can help me with some of your own suggestions in the comments section.

Purpose Driven Connection

Purpose Driven Connection

Purpose Driven Connection

Finding The Right Team

A major struggle with ministries is when passions collide. One leader may have a passion for outreach while another is passionate about spiritual growth. As Doug Fields points out in his youth ministry training, neither are bad and both are necessary. In fact, if everybody on the team is passionate about outreach the ministry would be very shallow. If every leader was passionate about spiritual growth, the ministry would miss out on other needs. To be balanced, the ministry must have leaders with a passions that meet a variety of needs.

We use the Purpose Driven Youth Ministry model. Our ministry is built around 5 biblical purposes. It exists to REACH non-believing students, to CONNECT them with other believers, to help them GROW in their faith, SERVE in ministry, and HONOR God with their lives. To be balanced, our ministry team has a variety of leaders who can champion purposes they are already passionate about.

I serve as a small group leader for the high school ministry at my church. In the home where we meet, there are two other small groups. Because each leader is passionate about different biblical purposes, our small groups are well balanced and our ministry is growing.

[Continued below…]

Bill_Sarah_Dennis

Here’s how our team is balanced around the 5 biblical purposes:

Bill – (Reach, Connect) – an older guy who has grandkids, Bill isn’t the stereotypical youth leader, but he is an indispensable part of our team. His passion is reaching out and bringing in non-believing students. Bill reaches out by taking students once a month to a homeless shelter in Santa Ana. Our upper-middle class students get their eyes opened to how less fortunate people live while also getting some great ministry experience. Bill also regularly challenges students to bring their non-believing friends to Bible study. This effort on his part has increased the impact of our ministry to students who may not otherwise know Christ.

Sarah – (Grow, Discover) – a mid-20’s soft-hearted leader who is gentle and loving with her girls. She’s a nurse who has a degree from a private Christian college. She uses her education to provide top-notch leadership and teaching for her girls. By the nature of being a nurse for terminally-ill cancer patients, Sarah is a great nurturer for her girls as they struggle with life and grow spiritually. When Sarah was in high school she served in the high school worship band. She brings that passion for service to her girls who are now serving in ministries at the church.

Dennis – (Grow, Honor) – that’s me – I’m the long-term volunteer who brings excitement and a load of fun to the group. Those who know me, but don’t see me in a leadership role, will laugh at this. Outside of leading small groups, I tend to be more quiet and reserved. I’ve been doing youth ministry since 1994. My degree is in religion from Point Loma Nazarene College. In addition to keeping the Bible study fun, my passion is to see students develop an intimate relationship with their Creator. I continually challenge them to connect with God, journal, read their Bibles and pray daily. In addition to growing spiritually, I am passionate about students learning to worship (HONOR) God on their own. I believe there is an element of honoring God in each of the purposes. However, I specifically teach my students tips for honoring God through their quiet times.

I’ve worked with several youth ministry teams over the years. This is the second year Bill and Sarah have been on my team. This is the first time I can say my team has been well balanced. From now on, anytime I add a new team member, I will find one that specifically complements the gifts that are already present instead of duplicating what we already have.

National Youth Ministry Conference

National Youth Ministry Conference

National Youth Ministry Conference

Youth ministry conferences are a great source of training, encouragement and spiritual renewal. I hope every youth ministry volunteer can get to a training event at least once per year. When we take time to learn, get recharged and grow in our faith, we last longer as volunteers, our ministry is stronger and we’re more centered on Christ.

nywc_details

Serving Out of an Abundance

An Uncomplicated Guide to Reconnecting With God

Refuel: An Uncomplicated Guide to Reconnecting With God

Lately I’ve had a deep desire to reconnect with God. Sometimes as a youth ministry volunteer I feed spiritual scraps to my small group students because that’s all I have to give. When I was the paid professional youth worker I went through times like this, too. I know we all do. Unless I continually renew my passion for God, I won’t be able to serve out of an overflow of God’s work in my life.

Fortunately, Doug Fields just came out with this new book called Refuel. Refuel has been very helpful for me as I journey to renew my passion for God.

I want to be what God wants me to be and do what he has in store for me to do. Unless I do it out of an abundance of what He is doing in my life, I’ll head toward discouragement, my students will be cheated and under-challenged, and my ministry will be a burden instead of fruitful. Refuel has helped bring me back to the basics of connecting with God and it’s making a difference.

Click here for more information about Refuel. I know it will help fellow youth workers reconnect with God like it’s helping me.

Purpose Driven Youth Ministry Conference ’09

pdym_09_graphic1

The Purpose Driven Youth Ministry (PDYM) Conference is a great training event because it educates and motivates youth workers of all types to create health in their ministries. The folks at PDYM know that once you create a healthy youth ministry, spiritual and numerical growth will be a natural result. This conference is about changing lives by helping ministries build themselves around 5 biblical purposes.

PDYM has something for youth workers of all types; newbies, veterans, volunteers, paid staff, ready to quit, looking to step it up a notch, in spiritual life support, or on spiritual overdrive.

Do what it takes to get signed up before it sells out.

Doug Fields, a 25-year youth ministry veteran and author of over 30 books, will be the main presenter. He hosts the weekly Simply Youth Ministry Podcast and, with his wife, Cathy, hosts The Marriage and Youth Ministry Podcast.

Click here for conference registration and information

Rick Warren Prayer at Inauguration

I am a member of Saddleback Church where I also serve on the volunteer staff of the high school ministry. It’s so great to see our pastor making an impact on the world… even though it’s brought both very good and bad reactions among different groups.